For Those Who Need a Good Laugh

Mark Virkler's picture

Since a merry heart does good like medicine, we could all use some medicine. Here you go. Two funny jokes and one powerful act of kindness story, which will touch your heart.


The sermon with a twist at the end

A minister was completing a temperance sermon.

 With great emphasis he said, 'If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.'

 With even greater emphasis he said, 'And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.'

And then finally, shaking his fist in the air, he Said, 'And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.'

Sermon complete, he sat down.

The song leader stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, nearly laughing, 'For our closing song, let us sing Hymn #365, 'Shall We Gather at the River.'

The not-so-Christian driver with Christian bumper stickers

An honest man was being tailgated by a stressed-out woman on a busy boulevard.

Suddenly, the light turned yellow just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailgating woman hit the roof, and the horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection.

As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, and photographed, and then placed in a holding cell.

After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'What Would Jesus Do?' bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Sunday School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk.

Naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car!"

The random act of kindness that transformed a life

As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.

Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy, and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.

It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's, and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.

At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.

Teddy's first-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around.."

His second-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well-liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."

His third-grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."

Teddy's fourth-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class."

By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper That he got from a grocery bag Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume.. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at least an hour.

On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing, and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets.."

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling* her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.

Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in life.

Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer.... The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.

The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.

Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.

They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for* believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."

Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."

(For you that don't know, Teddy Stoddard is the Dr. at Iowa Methodist Hospital in Des Moines that has the Stoddard Cancer Wing.)

Warm someone's heart today. . . pass this along. Just try to make a difference in someone's life today. Just "do it".

Random acts of kindness, I think they call it?

 

Related Blogs: 

Healing Emotional Dis-ease   Prayer Approaches   
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How Do YOU Know? MP3 Download Package

by Mark Virkler | 180-Page PDF eBook | 12 MP3 Sessions | LEARN eWorkbook PDF

How do you know? What is the process you use to discover truth? I did not ask that question during the first 25 years of my life. I used eleven different methods for discovering truth including: if my parents said so, then it was so. If my teacher said it was so, then it was so. If my pastor said it was so, then it was so. If my theology said it was so, then it was so. I have discarded them all and adopted a twelfth method, which is in harmony with what the Bible teaches. We teach you this method in this series. 

This package includes a 180-page PDF ebook, a 12-session MP3 audio series, and a 40-page PDF eworkbook ($79.85 value).

Price: $79.85
How to Walk by the Spirit MP3 Download Package

How to Walk by the Spirit MP3 Package

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 1 eWorkbook | 12 MP3s

Are you like many western Christians who have been taught little about how to sense their spirits? Do you have trouble even defining what spirit sensations feel like within you, much less recognizing them? This training was birthed from Mark’s passion to live out of his spirit, and thus release the anointing of God. The problem he faced was lack of clear biblical definition as to what his spirit felt like. So Mark looked up every verse in the Bible on heart and spirit.

Includes Revised & Expanded 15th Anniversary Edition MP3s

Price: $73.90
Introduction to the Supernatural MP3 Package

Introduction to the Supernatural MP3 Package

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 1 eBooklet | 2 MP3s | Instant download

You don't have to wait 20 years, like I did, to move in the supernatural power of God. Once you know WHAT to do, it is simply a matter of doing it. You take your newfound understanding of how to move in the Spirit and you walk out on the water in faith and discover the anointing of God rests upon you and flows through you. Let us teach you how!

Price: $8.00
Naturally Supernatural MP3 Download Package

Naturally Supernatural MP3 Download Package

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 2 eBooks | 13 MP3 Sessions

Now with Revised & Expanded 30th Anniversary Edition MP3s!

A step-by-step guide on “abiding in Christ” or how to let go and let God live naturally and powerfully out through you. Disarmingly simple. Mind-blowingly powerful.

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Overflow of the Spirit - MP3 Download Package

Overflow of the Spirit MP3 package

12 Sessions | Book 284 pgs | Workbook 50 pgs | by Mark Virkler and Charity Kayembe

Mark and Charity have teamed up again to create a training series on how to easily manifest the nine gifts of the Holy Spirit. It took us several years to break through all the confusion and present a clear, simple understanding of how to release the nine-fold manifestation of the Holy Spirit everywhere you go and with everyone you touch. It is not hard! It can’t be since these are gifts of the Holy Spirit, not things you have to work for.

Price: $72.89
Rivers of Grace MP3 Audio Package

Rivers of Grace MP3 Audio Package

by Mark and Patti Virkler | 1 PDF eBook | 1 LEARN Notebook PDF | 5 MP3 Sessions

You can be the parent God wants you to be: loving, encouraging, trusting and able to raise up your children in the way they should go, fulfilling their own unique destinies. Parenting was not intended to be a burden, and anyone who tells you differently has bought into a lie. You will learn to enjoy parenting as an exciting, joy-filled, divinely-ordained opportunity, not a wearying responsibility.

Price: $23.92
Spirit-Anointed Teaching MP3 Audio Package

Spirit-Anointed Teaching MP3 Audio Package

2 ebooks | MP3 Download, PowerPoint Download

Spirit-Anointed Teaching Materials designed to strengthen ALL teachers including parents, Sunday school teachers, cell group leaders, pastors and educators in every field! These materials will give you the tools to become a Spirit-anointed trainer!

“They were amazed at His teaching; He was teaching them as one having authority, and not as the scribes.” (Mark 1:22)

Price: $15.73

Take Charge of Your Health MP3 Package

by Mark Virkler | 1 eBook | 12 MP3 Sessions

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Or save 50% off the School of the Spirit e-learning module!

Discover how you can take charge of your own health — keeping yourself young, energetic, attractive, and free of degenerative diseases! Discover the biblical injunctions on diet and health, and the amazing correlations between them and modern scientific research. Updated in 2015 with 20 years of fresh insights since recording the previous "Go Natural" series!

Price: $52.43

Through the Bible 1: Pentateuch MP3 Package

10 MP3 Sessions by Dr. Andrew Hardy | 1 eBook by Mark and Patti Virkler

Dr. Andrew Hardy takes you from Genesis through Deuteronomy in 10 sessions. This is part one of our Through the Bible series, which gives you an overview of the entire Bible. It contains MP3 downloads of Pentateuch as well as Through the Bible PDF e-workbook

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Through the Bible Discounted MP3 Package

Through the Bible MP3 Discounted Package

1 Book | 8 MP3 Sets | 1 Single MP3

This package gives you the tools to transform your study of the Scriptures into encounters with their Author Who will personally reveal what He wants to say to you through them each day! First is a MP3 which teaches you how to meditate on Scriptures so you receive revelation from the Holy Spirit as you prayerfully read the Word (Josh. 1:8; Eph. 1:17,18). You will discover how this is different from, and much deeper than, simple western study. Next is a Through the Bible workbook PDF ebook which guides you chapter-by-chapter through the entire Bible. Finally, we provide the cultural, historical and linguistic insights of Dr. Andrew Hardy, a British scholar in the eight video download sets which are all part of this discounted package.

Price: $108.00

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